Wednesday, January 04, 2012

happy new year

holiday schedule almost kicked my butt...but all in all not so bad.  i finally have my central line numbers!  and the other day on call i got fem sticks on an essentially dead person...no pulse for my landmark and the code team was doing CPR, so i was proud of myself for finding blood on my first stick.  so it was nice when i had to do one on a living patient in the trauma bay that i also got that one on my first stick as well.

everybody's been talking about resolutions.  i'll throw some of mine out there...

  • exercise at least once a week (which is going to be hard, believe you me)
  • cook more
  • read the entirety of greenfield's this year (might as well set lofty goals...haha)
so there you go.  reflecting on the last year, it's kind of amazing to see where i am now.  i can't believe intern year is half over, and i guess i'm not as bad as i think i am.  i hope by now the other residents feel that they can trust me, at least with the little things.  i've become more confident in my "this shit is bad" sense, ha.  i do need to work on my confidence level and speak more authoritatively.  i do need to become more efficient...i know i have, but it's still a long road.  i refuse to compromise thoroughness, and i won't apologize for that.

right now H and i are looking at possibly buying a house vs. renting...it's weird thinking about "grown up" things.  a part of me is afraid to do anything until i get my ABSITE score back...and oh yeah that test is jan 28.  puke.  (after i finish this blog entry i'll be doing a practice test to scare myself.)

i'm happy where i am.  sure, it sucks to not see friends and family, or to not see H in 36+ hours at a time, but i do enjoy my job.  it sucks also when you have edema around your ankles after a long day, and i should probably invest in some support hose while i'm thinking about it.  and my back hurts a lot, but the free massages through my insurance help out!  it super sucks when a chief calls you out on a mistake or your omission of important facts, but you just have to realize they want you to become a "bad ass" to quote the words of one of my chiefs.  (Frylime, i don't want you to become a good surgeon, i want you to be a bad ass!)  ok then!  i'm trying!  really hard!

so excuse me for a bit while i go cram some ABSITE.  i'll try to update more and be better about commenting.

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