Monday, May 24, 2010


man, i don't like sitting still in one spot reading/doing questions/etc...reminds me of what hell is probably like. i will say, studying for step 2 is much more enjoyable than step 1 at any rate. i took a practice test last night and it was a huge confidence booster. definitely not to the point of becoming overconfident, but a boost to tell me YOU CAN DO IT!

i'm currently brining some turkey legs. will make a spice rub to go on top and then braise them in the oven for a while. excited about dinner!

i can't believe that 2 weeks from now, i'll officially be an M4!!! there were definitely moments in my med school career that i thought it wasn't going to happen, but it most certainly has happened. and is still going on. yay!

so on to more questions...

Thursday, May 20, 2010

no more M3 clinicals!

today was a great day! no more M3 clinicals!!!

also, my crazy rash is more crazy today, so went by student health to get a decadron shot in the butt. the NP, after giving me my shot, accidentally stuck herself so i had to get my blood drawn for infectious diseases. she kept apologizing, but i was like, no, it's cool, i'm a super hypochondriac so it's good that i get tested! i'm clean anyway, and the NP was happy that it was someone like me to get stuck from, rather than someone else. the verdict?


the world is good today. haha!

tomorrow is my psych board...hopefully i'll do well. i'm glad that it's over...psych is so interesting, and the attending like EVERYDAY said "you should be a psychiatrist", but, i just want to move on to SURGERY!!! today we almost did an LP, but unfortunately the attending wanted IR to do it. boo! i wanted to do the LP!!!

still applying to away rotations...i've been denied to 2 places so far, but that's ok. these things fill up rather quickly. i'll throw a few more apps out and then call it a day. no big deal. if i don't get an away, i'll do path or rads.

alright, back to studying! yay! or not...haha. no AIDS!

Monday, May 17, 2010

last week

my face is itchy. terribly itchy. maybe i rubbed some plant juice on it, i don't know. it's really annoying. and i have a rash. i just took a loratidine and been rubbing some diphenhydramine on top. alas. i hope i don't have kawasaki's or something.

i'm drinking a strawberry abita beer. delicious.

one month from tomorrow i take my step 2 ck. scary.

i made some delicious noodles for dinner. they were quite satisfying.

i have my psych board friday. i've been doing some reading, about to do more questions. just wanted to update my internet friends...

Thursday, May 13, 2010

6 more days!

tomorrow is my CSA's to hoping i don't piss off any fake patients or *gasp* forget to DRAPE or listen UNDER the gown! i still can't believe i miss that every so often!

my catatonic patient had ECT done today and BAM S/HE IS A NEW PERSON! it is so amazing at how get better after a treatment! going from not talking very much and freaking out about the voices in your head to smiling and giddy and talking up a storm! and no more voices! wow. i'm so glad i got to see the results.

today i went to this annual "distinguished" lecture done by the surgery department at was really cool to hear it. it was an historical talk done about a pioneering surgeon from way back who paved the way for valvulotomies.. but so cool. it made me excited to get back to doing surgery again! july 1, here i come!

afterwards i went to the gym and watched the show "say yes to the dress" while i treadmilled. that show, man, it's so weird, but i can't help but watch it...just a bunch of women buying wedding dresses. "my budget is $9,000", man, that freaks me out every time. i can't imagine spending that much money on a dress to wear once. YES, the wedding dress has to be special, blah blah blah, but 9 grand? i would wear something from the gap over that and spend the rest on vacation. ha.

then i came home and have some beef brisket braising in the oven. i heart my dutch oven! EVERYONE MUST HAVE ONE. i hope it comes out deliciously...first time to ever tackle brisket. i just seasoned both sides vigorously with a bazillion spices, browned both sides, then sauteed some onion and garlic in the same pot, deglazed with some sherry, and then put the meat back in and popped it in the oven. low and slow supposedly is the way to do it, so i'm thinking an hour and a half will suffice. (it's only around 1.5 pounds.) but i'll probably do two anyway.

so i was thinking about some random advice for M1s and M2s that have to do clinical stuff. you know, like "shadow" people or do that ICM stuff where you interview a patient and it's horrible and nerve racking. trust me, this advice will help you out in a good way so that nobody (like us M3s, ha) makes fun of you. and yes, these are all inspired by true stories:
  • if you are dressing up and wearing your white coat, LADIES, please DO NOT WEAR HOOKER HEELS WITH HOOKER DRESSES/SKIRTS. omg. the other day i saw this girl wearing 3 inch stilettos that were blue suede appearing and strappy and open-toed. (they were cute, actually.) and she was wearing a cute dress, but it was short. and she was awkwardly walking with her obviously heavy appearing bookbag on. that outfit screams "hit on me please". plus 3 inch stilettos are no fun in standing around in and walking miles in the hospital. that outfit just broadcasted "i obviously don't know what i'm doing and would love to be hit on by nasty people." the mark of a med student in the clinical years: cute FLATS. or slight heels. and definitely no open-toe...if you were to drop a needle and stick your foot, well, that's your problem.
  • ALWAYS WASH YOUR HANDS! a poor student (who was terrified) came up to me after interviewing and examining a patient with questionable HIV status (test not back yet) was like "OMG SHOULD I WASH MY HANDS? WAS I SUPPOSED TO?" i just stared at him and was like "umm, yeah?" just wash them. or use the foamy stuff. and wear gloves if you don't know for sure someone is not going to give you scabies. or something like that. i almost wanted to ask "do you wash after you wipe your dookie off your booty hole?" but i didn't.
  • if you come in to observe a surgery, and you've obviously done gross anatomy, and the surgery is called "cholecystectomy", and you see the surgeons fumbling around a GREEN BAG SHAPED OBJECT, and the resident is explaining that someone is holding the fundus while they dissect out the cystic duct (obviously saying gall bladdery things), please don't go "IS THAT THE GALL BLADDER?" omg, you've been through GROSS, the damn thing is GREEN and YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER. there was definitely a collective eye roll at that question. alas.
just trying to help you guys out, ha. as for me, it's shower time and then cs cram time. and then food!

Monday, May 10, 2010

2 weeks left of clinicals!

how exciting!

today was a great some major work done on the ward today. my super depressed patient (who is so depressed that s/he cannot even muster up enough will to even POOP at times) did what i said! i said "you have 2 goals today. number 1, get out of bed and watch tv in the day room. number 2, GO TO THE BATHROOM AND POO." not everyday you can tell someone that. and s/he did just so! and i made the patient laugh today! multiple times! super awesome. i really think this patient can be turned around, but it's going to be a long hard road. you just don't recover fast from things like depression, but i believe it can be done.

just an aside, we have a ton of borderline personality disorder patients on the ward. like a TON of them. and they've all made friends with each other. and they all bitch about the food. alas. it's tough to see people struggling with addiction. they delude themselves. they create havoc for their families. lie to everybody. just tough. i'm taking care of a patient in her mid-20s, and it's tough for me. i think, "man, what if i was the one on drugs? what if those times in my life where i had a bad day i had reached for some crack versus go talk it out with a friend?" i just can't help but think about her future should she choose to keep going down this road. i have an uncle that has a meth abuse problem, but i do believe he's in jail now for a long time due to being caught actually making meth. the shake and bake, i think. it would be nice to know that there's hope for his future, but honestly, i haven't seen the man since i was in junior high or so. i wouldn't recognize him now, especially since meth really changes the way you look in a bad way.

ok, back to happier topics!

i had a good weekend too...hung out with H's family and then turned around and hung out with my family. my mom made kimbap, a sort of korean sushi. it was SO GOOD. omg. she makes it like once or twice a year, and i'm so glad to have eaten a ton of it yesterday. and then leftovers today! yay! so for dinner tonight, kimbap leftovers, a lovely salad (with green leaf lettuce, celery, tomato, and strawberry...a HUGE fan of adding fruit to salads), and cheese and crackers! for dessert, a mango blueberry smoothie!

this wednesday i'm on call. friday is my school's mock step 2 cs exam. it will last all day, blah. i hate those things. but i'm more afraid to fail the real thing. it's over $1,000 to take it. alas. and then...MY BIRTHDAY IS ON SUNDAY!!! i will be turning the big 2-5...and I CAN'T WAIT! i LOVE getting older, and this number, 25, is so awesome because it's five squared! a quarter century! i love cool numbers...25 definitely fits the bill.

ok, with all that nerdiness, i think it might be time for me to head to bed. chao peoples!

Tuesday, May 04, 2010

frustrations, i suppose

so why is it that a lot of the psych people are trying to convince me to do psych?

today i was attempting to talk to my catatonic patient (who DOES talk to me, but not to most other people, and especially not in public) in front of a bazillion people, the attending says "sometimes we get tattoos for the M3s that say 'psychiatrist' and put them on their faces". i looked at him like "wtf" and he goes "yeah, you should really consider being a psychiatrist!". and i'm like, damn. then i wigged out via text to K who then consulted other friends sitting around the lunch table and they all decided that i need to do surgery, not psych. psych is enjoyable, but so was ob/gyn, so was half of medicine, and maybe some of fam med? if i wasn't going to do surgery, i'd do psych. yes, i like it a lot, BUT, there are some BIG THINGS that are keeping it from being #1. surgery is still way ahead. it's not like an instance where i feel a coin flip is in order. because if it really were like that, 50/50, i'd apply to both residencies and just see what happens. but it's not. and that's that. plus i hate memorizing drugs. too many drugs in psych. WAY too many. and i really don't like the whole "let's throw different meds at you until you're happy/not seeing visions/not trying to kill people" sort of way to fix people. give me a knife, a needle, and some thread. and suction, please. i need to stop thinking about "lifestyle" because WHO KNOWS HOW IT WILL BE UNTIL IT IS.

i might have some wonderful friends come stay with me this weekend. i'm hoping that they decide to come for sure. it would be a nice thing.

i'm excited about dinner tonight...H and i are planning to make some lamb shoulder chops, broccoli, and polenta. SUPER excited!

ok, about to do some world questions. i can't wait to stop sucking at them.

Saturday, May 01, 2010

lovely saturday

ridiculously long post ahead, hahaha!

nice thing about psych...weekends off! this morning i ate a bagel, had some coffee, swept my balcony, took photos of my lovely plants, did some world questions. world, you are the bane of my existence!!! but my plants look lovely! my strawberry plant has a flower on it, my salvia is exploding with blooms, and i think i have tiny limes growing on my lime tree. i repotted my pumpkin plants and hopefully i can train them to go up the railing on the balcony. that would be awesome to have a PUMPKIN this fall! it's raining off and on this morning as well. H is back from his work trip, and i'm happy for that too!

right now i'm watching the "i can't believe i was pregnant" show on discovery. that show is so crazy...i would think a lot of these women are in extreme denial. and how is it that these babies are all born "healthy"? even with the mamas smoking and drinking, etc. alas.

i went and hung out in the cardiothoracic surg clinic this week, and i was totally reminded of why i want to do surgery! saw some cool patients, wished that i could see their surgeries. the ct guys are excited that i'm coming to do a month with them in july. i think i might be the only student to sign up for a ct month? maybe i'm a masochist...haha. it's just that problems within the chest are SO COOL.

psych is still fun, but i experienced some frustrations at the tail end of this week. i realized that i am a "quick fix" kind of gal...long and steady are NOT what i like. you come in with depression, and we give you medicines. you feel better. and better. we get excited! then BAM, you have the major sads again for no reason. for me, this is so aggravating. but for others, it's just part of the treatment process. they don't mind the long and steady. and i just want to bang my head against the wall. other issues, like delusions and whatnot, super cool. but, none of those diseases are easily fixed in the short term. i guess sedation would work, but that's kind of wrong, ha!

M4 schedules are STILL not finalized, but i think mine should come out ok. i'm just lacking one course on my schedule. still haven't heard from away rotations, but those take a while, supposedly. it's going to be balls to the wall, to put it crassly, for the first 4 months of my M4 year. aak! once my schedule is perfected i'll post it here.

also, i got this comment on one of my recent blogs (hi kris! thanks for stopping by!) and thought i would put my thoughts down about it:

Other than surgery being hands on were there any other contributing factors ?
well, i liked being able to see people's INSIDES! to me, being in the OR is so much fun...there's a ton of teamwork involved with doing surgery. and i'm a visual person, and i like seeing how people are put together. and this may sound weird or whatever, but i really appreciate how when the patient is draped and prepped, you can only see what you're working on. people may claim they don't judge or whatever, but we all do it to some extent. i appreciate how in surgery, you just expose what you're working on and get to work. sometimes tunnel vision is a good thing, ha. i found myself getting too emotionally involved during family medicine, etc, and getting upset when patients would flat out lie to my face. i don't like that very much. i don't know if that makes sense to you, but it does to me.

I know that surgery is a challenging specialty - not to say that the other residencies are not - and I know that there's the notion that this is a male-dominated area of medicine. How true is this ? Is close to everyone a gunner ??

i know it's still pretty male-dominated, but i think there are a lot of females coming into the field too. that's not really a concern for me though, i've always done more "boy" things...playing drums in high school, engineering in college, etc. and gunners are in ANY learn how to spot them in college...haha. and then you see more in med school. i enjoyed my surgery rotation a lot...didn't experience too many ill personalities, but then again, there are weirdos in EVERY field. you can't escape them.

I'm still a senior high school so I have a LONG way to go before med school but I'm still interested in hearing about your ambitions.
keep up the good work! and you may surprise yourself with what you like to do. if truly interested in medicine, PLEASE shadow as many different doctors as possible. medicine is definitely not something you should do on a lark...and you can always come to medicine later in life. there is no rule that says you must go straight into medicine after college. so for now, just do a lot of shadowing, work in a hospital, or just volunteer, and do your best in school!

hope this post wasn't too boring...if anyone else out there has questions, i'm super happy to help! and now H is on his way for us to go get some delicious pizza and then workout afterwards...woo!