Monday, April 26, 2010

mini crisis

not a real crisis, per say, but a lot of thoughts in my head that are semi-racing and irritating me?

i've had a decent day, tried to work on my research from a long time ago and failed miserably at remembering how to work stupid statistics programs, but had a decent day by the end of it. i went to the gym after school, cleaned my kitchen, and made some dinner: leftover cold steak pieces (because i needed protein and was too lazy to reheat it), open-faced wheat bagel with cream cheese, basil, tomato slice and some onion, and 1/4 avocado. it was quite delicious. i feel good now. but i do need to step study. aaak.

maybe if i spell out all my troubles i will feel better? and since this is my blog i can do whatever i want. and H is away on a work trip so i have nobody to talk to.
  • MONEY. money money money. not "omg i'm going to have tons of debt", but more like "oh $*%& my next loans don't come in until july 7 and clearly my bank account is running dry like NOW". luckily i have things called "mutual fund of emergency money" and "parents". haha...so not a huge deal, but just annoying because i try my hardest to be self-sufficient...that little ego of mine is bigger than i'd like it to be.
  • health insurance. i turn 25 next month, and from my understanding, the "health insurance until your 26" thing doesn't go into effect until OCTOBER. well, that doesn't help me. so i have to figure out how to get my health insurance from school. it's not going to be too difficult, but just annoying.
  • specialty choice. now don't get me wrong...i LOVE surgery!!! love it! i can't wait to get back into the OR. SEE SOMEONE'S INSIDES AGAIN. HOLD THE COLON. you catch my drift. but now on psych, i really like it. there's something so interesting talking to someone who is telling you about their visions and what the voices in their head are telling them like it's talking about the weather, or what's for dinner tonight. it's comparing apples to oranges, really. they are so different you can't compare them too well, but i would be lying if i didn't think about things like "i could deal with not doing what i 99.9% enjoy for something with a more defined lifestyle". but honestly, how will i know what ANY lifestyle for me is going to be like? i can't tell the future! i've always managed to find a way that suits me best, so why wouldn't i be able to find the best surgeon job for me? and plus, people who ramble start pissing me off after a while (even though i ramble...haha), and a lot of psych problems involve rambling. and i still HATE clinic. at least in surgery people are silent when it counts...haha. and i'm hands on. psych is most definitely hands off.
  • step 2. enough said.
ok, i think i've complained enough. hope i didn't bore you. OH, and another reason why i probably can't be a psychiatrist...i am so hypochondriac-y and paranoid about everything...i think it would only make me worse! ok, going to attempt some studying now...bye!

Sunday, April 18, 2010

psych is fun!

i've really been enjoying myself this rotation. i like how you don't have to touch patients. i like how everyone is crazy in an interesting way (or it wouldn't be psych, right?! ha!) and how you have to get buzzed in through two sets of double doors to go in. it's interesting for me to think about who these people are, what they did in their former lives before getting diagnoses like schizophrenia or bipolar disorder or drug addiction. inpatient psych is super cool. i could never do psych though, at least not now, because of all the OUTpatient stuff...outpatient clinics just drive me to tears. i get so bored. so i'm thinking, i'm still going to do surgery, but maybe once my technical dexterity goes away or something, i can do another residency in psych and have brain fun for the rest of my career.

my little container garden is doing well so far! i'm quite excited about the possibilities for this summer...hopefully our lime tree will make us a lime or two. i have some little pumpkin plants growing...i hope they can do some magical things as well.

i've been re-inspired to post things on the food blog H and i have. we'll see if i can stick to it, ha. but i should post some things on there...we've been watching the food revolution on hulu and it's really interesting.

and step 2 studying is at a standstill. i seem to do badly on my practice questions no matter what, but i guess slow and steady wins the race, right? also, schedules still are not back yet, and i'm getting antsy to know how about my surgery months will be scheduled. plus i'm planning an away rotation for october and i want to know if that's going to be possible. i've applied to 3 different schools right now, planning on applying to one more. oh yeah, and another one as well. i've been told to not hold my breath on finding out if i've gotten any right now...usually we get notification in june or july or something like that.

as for now, i should get back to studying. and thinking about dinner. and thinking about an outdoor activity, as i have not exercised today. but, i can always go tomorrow, and i went yesterday and had an awesome workout. it's alright to take a day off, right? haha...alas.

Monday, April 12, 2010

first day on psych

and i was leaving for home at 2:00. today was the best day ever! hahaha, j/k. tomorrow i don't have to show up until 8:30. hopefully i'll get to stay on that particular service, rumor has it the attending T and i were assigned to quit. alas.

it's such a beautiful day outside. H and i were considering biking, but we might go play some frisbee too. is it possible to have M3-itis? because i totally have it now.

we got to tour the psych wards today, and for some reason it just wasn't as i had pictured it. a lot more sterile and brighter than i imagined? it's kind of quaint actually. they have their own laundry rooms and everything!

ok, time for some step 2 studying...but maybe i'll clean out my car first. i should load my bike up just in case we go out and about...

Sunday, April 11, 2010

golden weekend of sorts

family medicine DONE, psychiatry begins tomorrow. looking forward to it...can't wait for the stories!

also, i hate fake patient encounters...but at the same time, they are helpful in a weird way. but still hate them. especially when the patient is going very slowly or purposely hiding info from you. oh well. and this far into the game i still forgot to drape a patient and listening "under" the gown. blah.

this weekend has been great! friday night went out with some friends to a fancy bar in town. had a pear martini, and it was delicious! makes me want to learn how to make it on my own. mixology classes, anyone? then saturday my school hosted a crawfish boil and i had my annual helping of crawfish...yum. there were also bouncy castles and we bounced and flipped around...so much fun! and we also had a battle thing but i lost pretty easily when my opponent squared me in the head. (i was trying to go for her knees but she played dirty...ha.) then we had a potluck sort of dinner/game night. i made curried butternut squash soup and it was pretty good for being completely on the fly. in retrospect i would have liked to have pureed it a bit more to make it more smooth, simmer a bit longer to thicken the soup just a tad, and add coconut milk! i had used cream, which is lovely too, but coconut milk would have sent it over the edge. i thought i had the spices just right...sometimes i forget that when i cook for other people, they might not appreciate spiciness like me and H do, but everyone told me (at least to my face, ha!) that it wasn't overdone and 2 people with sinus issues loved how it cleared them out. oooh, and if i was doing it for real, i would have crushed some peanuts and chopped cilantro or parsley for garnish.

today so far has been relaxing, late breakfast (bordering on the lunch variety), and some cleaning of the bathrooms. also, emptied a whole bunch of expired containers out of the fridge. it feels good to unclog the fridge. for the rest of the day i think will be spent relaxing, STUDYING FOR STEP 2 OMG, and some spot cleaning here and there. and staring at my plants...i can just stare at the for hours...i love coming home in the afternoon and seeing how much they have grown or turned to face the sun or whatever. LOVE IT! i can't WAIT to have my own garden with REAL fruits and veggies!

alright shower time so i can get on with the day...woo!

Wednesday, April 07, 2010

UGH.

sorry for the lack of blogging. i've been so utterly bored at school, and then i come home and have to do grunt work or just a ton of socializing. life is hard.

time for a rant about stupid people.

when you have bad diabetes, and are currently on ONE ORAL MEDICATION that is NOT even on its FULL STRENGTH, and you've been checking your blood sugars at home and "notice" that it's OVER 300 for the past few days, and oh by the way your abdomen hurts and you feel pukey, OMG GO TO THE DOCTOR NOW!!! then you end up in the ER in DKA (diabetic ketoacidosis) with sugars over 700-800 or so. and try to pay attention when the diabetes educator teaches you about how to use insulin (because you WILL be on insulin now, gotta love those shots) and what foods NOT to eat. don't call your cousin to bring you donuts because you don't like hospital food. and when your medical student asks you how you've been tolerating your diet, while she appreciates that you told her she "hates the hospital food" so you had VANILLA ICE CREAM and SWEET TEA instead, OMG ARE YOU STUPID? you are IN THE HOSPITAL because you could not control your blood sugar, but then you decide to keep eating sugar while IN THE HOSPITAL because you don't like the bland food? even after you've been told that if you keep eating sugary food, you'll get an infection in your feet and might have to get them cut off? (more or less!) gotta love that ice cream, it made your sugar blast back up over 400 after the team had gotten it down into the low 200s.

ok, end that rant. this is why family medicine is not for me, sadly.

luckily, my other patient is a sweet sweet lady...her main issue is that she is super morbidly obese...over 500 pounds, pushing 600, and that is causing her some issues with her medical management. i'm sad that tomorrow is my last day to visit with her. such a nice lady, i hope she gets better soon and gets some gastric bypass or something in the future...

so now i'm busy doing stupid busy work for family medicine...all our stuff is due friday and i'm in the midst of procrastinating and doing a terrific job at that. have to finish inputting my patient log, write my H&P, and study for our test...HA. study. what a nice word. i need to get back on the step 2 studying, but i guess that will wait until this weekend.

monday i start psych. woo! that means study time!